i think that it really depends on the situation to be honest. if it's a party that someone has offered to throw - then they should pay...but if it's a gathering where you've invited people
and said 'you don't have to RSVP - just show up' then they should split the bill. i've been at parties wehre it's been hard and i've ended up paying my own way at my own celebration, but
that's cause i have cheapo friends who eat/drink A LOT and don't consider that they have no money or don't want to shell it out.
I agree with ilanac - it comes down to who did the inviting. If it were my bday and I invited everyone, I would be throwing myself a party and paying for it. If a friend organized it and
invited people, friends would be chipping in.
I am trying to organize an informal gathering at a bar in a couple of weeks for my b-day so this came at the right time! I def would not expect people to pay my way at this event (nice as it
would be!) - I invited them to come celebrate with me.
Yes-it depends on who arranged the party and how.
If I invited the group and set up the menu etc. I'd consider my friends as guests and it would be my obligation to pay. But if it were thrown for me (yay!) I would think of the meal as
birthday gift and not pay.
Does that make sense?
I have to admit, I still have a sore spot on this one. About two years ago an veggie friend and I went to one of our co-worker's birthday dinners and her friend not only didn't pay for her,
they didn't cover all of their tabs. I had a salad a mixed drink and I ended up putting $60 on the table. My veggie friend had the same salad and iced tea and put $50 on the table. The
birthday girl put $40 on the table.
If I invite people to a party for someone...say, my husband...then I always pay the entire bill. If we decide as a group to get together then everyone pays for themselves and pitches in an
equal amount for the birthday person. Like for my daughter's graduation lunch at Cheesecake Factory...I invited grandma, great grandma, uncles and aunts, plus the 4 of us as a family. I paid
the bill. I think if you invite others you should pay.
I think it depends on where you are in life, too. In college, my friends and I would go out to a restaurant to celebrate birthdays. Everyone would pay their own way, but buy the birthday
person's dinner (and/or drink it was their 21st). If you're earning an income, I think it's more appropriate to pay for your guests.
Yep, I agree with ilanac, it depends on who invited whom and how the invitation was worded. If you told someone, "Hey, let us take you out for your birthday", then I would expect those people
to pay for the birthday person. If the person who was having the birthday said they wanted to meet up at a restaurant/bar for their birthday, I would expect either everyone to pay for their
own or the birthday person to pay, depending on how they told everyone about it and where they were going.
I agree with everybody, if it's friends wanting to take the b-day person out they should pay, if she/he invited you then it would be nice to pick up the tab for the b-day person but shouldn't
be expected. I do think each individual should pay for themselves (b-day person excluded) it just makes things less awkward.
I am a firm believer in whoever asked or (is throwing the party, in this case) should do the paying. You can't take full responsibility for planning a dinner or party and wimp-out when it
comes time for paying the check!
For my last birthday, my parents paid for Chinese (it was a family supper and my boyfriend was there), but generally, if I go out with friends, we all pay for our own meals. If the birthday
girl/ guy has a date, the date generally pays for them and if not, we all chip in for their meal.
Ooooh worst thing happened at my birthday a couple yeas ago. With my friends we always pitch in for the birthday person. Always have. So we go to dinner, big party and have a great time. Food
comes out, and my boyfriend doesnt get his. We wait for a while and finally ask the waiter what's going on and he plays like he didn't notice that Brendan didn't have any food. Needless to
say, his meal was comp'd. Well everyone is done and some people start to leave. a couple that I thought were cool, left $20 on the table. For both their meals, both their beers, tip. That was
MAYBE half their bill. When I called her, because I thought maybe another $20 fell or something, she said Oh No, we ordered the cheapest things on the menu, that covers us. Uhm the cheapest
thing on the menu was $15 how could that cover both of them? Anyway, the night ends with just a couple of us there. Somehow we got screwed and between my boyfriends free dinner and it being
my birthday, we should have only had to pay for drinks and tip and such. We paid $150. and then the waiter accidentally double charged his CC. it sucked.
Depends on how it was organized. When I organized a birthday dinner for myself last year, I put all the drinks on my tab, and everyone split (including me) the meals for what they ate. But at
party people organized and threw for me I let them pay for my meal. If there is an actual invitation/host (aka more than an evite), then that person pays and one should not be expected to
chip in.
If it's an extravagant restaurant that the birthday guy/girl choose, then they may be paying their own way depending on who is invited...that is if it's the sort of place you don't usually
frequent. But if it's the type of place you would go usually, then yes I feel that everyone should pay their own way and then split the birthday's one.
I'm a fan of everyone splitting the bill and covering the birthday boy or girl's meal. However, the birthday dinner recipient needs to express the appropriate amount of gratitude! I've been
at dinner where the bday guy didn't really seem to care or really say thanks.
I also agree with the others who say it depends on who set up the party and who invited who etc. Of course even if the birthday girl/guy invited everyone out, it's a very nice and generous
offer for the guests to split the bill, it should not be expected.
This is why I only to go to big dinner's with really close friends! All of my friends hate the calculating the bill part (it so can kill a good time) so one of us just throws down our card
and the next time someone else does it.
With my friends in Indonesia and Singapore, the birthday girl/guy pays. With my friends here, we either split the bill and pay for the birthday person, or we each (including the bday person)
pay our own share.
I personally don't want the bday person to pay for anything. But I hate freeloaders at parties.
When my friends and I go out for birthdays, usually it's the significant other that pays for the birthday person's meal. But if there is no significant other, SOMEONE always offers. That's
just how we are.
With my work buddies. It's all girls & 1 guy. And whenever it's one of the girls' birthdays, he buys that girl lunch. He does that he says because us girls take turns baking the cakes for
the birthdays (his included!).
This happens a lot. In fact just last Friday I went to a birthday celebration for a friend who turned 21. We're all broke college students, but we're honest haha. We pay for what we ate and
drank. I have never been in a situation where we split the bill equally amongst everyone, even people who didn't eat or drink. NEVER. We pay for what we want. Some of us who feel like being
generous will chip in for the birthday boy/girl, so they don't have to pay. I don't see why people even bother to split the bill among everyone. People stop being cheap. That's not fair. If
you can't afford something, don't go. It's that freakin' simple. Don't try to spread it out among everyone.
Well I suppose it depends. Ya'll that answered before me are probably professionals and have good or acceptable jobs. College students just don't have the same amount of money to throw
around, for lack of a better term. Why should someone who bought five different things pay the same as someone who bought nothing, or vice versa. And it depends on the place too. I don't
think you would be all reaching for your wallets at a highbrow restaurant. But that's what we do at my school. We just all pass around the bill and take out our money and add it to the book,
rounding up for tip. It's very fair that way. And we're all honest and not moochers. If someone tries to(it has been very rare), we call them on it. You pay your share. It's just good home
training.
when i have birthday dinners, i pay for it (or my parents=) bec. i invited them plus they give me gifts so its like im giving back to them, but if it is thrown for me...then i should be paid
for.
On my 17th birthday my two best friends and I went out to eat dinner. They had offered to pay for me as a gift. When the bill came they fought over who had to pay the extra penny from the
uneven split. I finally became so irritated that I paid the whole bill and left. I mostly spend my birthday with my family or boyfriend and they usually pay. If it is a group of friends I
will offer to pay and I have always been turned down, since that night. My birthday is coming up on the 17th and I intend to spend a quite night with a few close friends and family. I am
inviting people and I will pay for the meal because many of my nearest and dearest are traveling to be with me for my 24th birthday.
It's always been a tradition with me and my friends that the birthday guy/girl would pay for the dinner, and so far we've had no arguments about it (except maybe which restaurant we'll be
booking and how many people should we invite when there are two birthday guys/girls). But it's also okay to call it off once in a while. There's not much pressure about birthday celebrations
with my friends, which is why I love them. Haha.
I ALWAYS pay for my own birthday dinner! It never fails! It's not that I want to pay for it, I guess I just have cheapo friends or something. AND If I didn't say HEY, were all gonna go get
some dinner for my birthday, then there would be NO celebration whatsoever. I have good friends too, and no one will ever step up and pitch in a little to help. EVER! It hurts my heart cause
if it were me in their situation, I will always step up and not make them pay!
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i think that it really depends on the situation to be honest. if it's a party that someone has offered to throw - then they should pay...but if it's a gathering where you've invited people and said 'you don't have to RSVP - just show up' then they should split the bill. i've been at parties wehre it's been hard and i've ended up paying my own way at my own celebration, but that's cause i have cheapo friends who eat/drink A LOT and don't consider that they have no money or don't want to shell it out.
1I agree with ilanac - it comes down to who did the inviting. If it were my bday and I invited everyone, I would be throwing myself a party and paying for it. If a friend organized it and invited people, friends would be chipping in.
2I feel everyone should pay thier own bill, and then split the birthday person's bill!
3I am trying to organize an informal gathering at a bar in a couple of weeks for my b-day so this came at the right time! I def would not expect people to pay my way at this event (nice as it would be!) - I invited them to come celebrate with me.
4Yes-it depends on who arranged the party and how.
5If I invited the group and set up the menu etc. I'd consider my friends as guests and it would be my obligation to pay. But if it were thrown for me (yay!) I would think of the meal as birthday gift and not pay.
Does that make sense?
I have to admit, I still have a sore spot on this one. About two years ago an veggie friend and I went to one of our co-worker's birthday dinners and her friend not only didn't pay for her, they didn't cover all of their tabs. I had a salad a mixed drink and I ended up putting $60 on the table. My veggie friend had the same salad and iced tea and put $50 on the table. The birthday girl put $40 on the table.
I now only go to dinner with close friends.
SM
6yikes super mommy! my bday was last week and all my friends paid there way, while my BFF picked up my tab!
7If I invite people to a party for someone...say, my husband...then I always pay the entire bill. If we decide as a group to get together then everyone pays for themselves and pitches in an equal amount for the birthday person. Like for my daughter's graduation lunch at Cheesecake Factory...I invited grandma, great grandma, uncles and aunts, plus the 4 of us as a family. I paid the bill. I think if you invite others you should pay.
8I think it depends on where you are in life, too. In college, my friends and I would go out to a restaurant to celebrate birthdays. Everyone would pay their own way, but buy the birthday person's dinner (and/or drink it was their 21st). If you're earning an income, I think it's more appropriate to pay for your guests.
9Yep, I agree with ilanac, it depends on who invited whom and how the invitation was worded. If you told someone, "Hey, let us take you out for your birthday", then I would expect those people to pay for the birthday person. If the person who was having the birthday said they wanted to meet up at a restaurant/bar for their birthday, I would expect either everyone to pay for their own or the birthday person to pay, depending on how they told everyone about it and where they were going.
10I agree with everybody, if it's friends wanting to take the b-day person out they should pay, if she/he invited you then it would be nice to pick up the tab for the b-day person but shouldn't be expected. I do think each individual should pay for themselves (b-day person excluded) it just makes things less awkward.
11I am a firm believer in whoever asked or (is throwing the party, in this case) should do the paying. You can't take full responsibility for planning a dinner or party and wimp-out when it comes time for paying the check!
12For my last birthday, my parents paid for Chinese (it was a family supper and my boyfriend was there), but generally, if I go out with friends, we all pay for our own meals. If the birthday girl/ guy has a date, the date generally pays for them and if not, we all chip in for their meal.
13Ooooh worst thing happened at my birthday a couple yeas ago. With my friends we always pitch in for the birthday person. Always have. So we go to dinner, big party and have a great time. Food comes out, and my boyfriend doesnt get his. We wait for a while and finally ask the waiter what's going on and he plays like he didn't notice that Brendan didn't have any food. Needless to say, his meal was comp'd. Well everyone is done and some people start to leave. a couple that I thought were cool, left $20 on the table. For both their meals, both their beers, tip. That was MAYBE half their bill. When I called her, because I thought maybe another $20 fell or something, she said Oh No, we ordered the cheapest things on the menu, that covers us. Uhm the cheapest thing on the menu was $15 how could that cover both of them? Anyway, the night ends with just a couple of us there. Somehow we got screwed and between my boyfriends free dinner and it being my birthday, we should have only had to pay for drinks and tip and such. We paid $150. and then the waiter accidentally double charged his CC. it sucked.
14Depends on how it was organized. When I organized a birthday dinner for myself last year, I put all the drinks on my tab, and everyone split (including me) the meals for what they ate. But at party people organized and threw for me I let them pay for my meal. If there is an actual invitation/host (aka more than an evite), then that person pays and one should not be expected to chip in.
15I agree that it depends on the organizer or the inviter!
16i agree with silly3. it depends on who did the inviting.
17If it's an extravagant restaurant that the birthday guy/girl choose, then they may be paying their own way depending on who is invited...that is if it's the sort of place you don't usually frequent. But if it's the type of place you would go usually, then yes I feel that everyone should pay their own way and then split the birthday's one.
18I'm a fan of everyone splitting the bill and covering the birthday boy or girl's meal. However, the birthday dinner recipient needs to express the appropriate amount of gratitude! I've been at dinner where the bday guy didn't really seem to care or really say thanks.
19Split it between everyone.
20I also agree with the others who say it depends on who set up the party and who invited who etc. Of course even if the birthday girl/guy invited everyone out, it's a very nice and generous offer for the guests to split the bill, it should not be expected.
21This is why I only to go to big dinner's with really close friends! All of my friends hate the calculating the bill part (it so can kill a good time) so one of us just throws down our card and the next time someone else does it.
22Everyone split the bill except the bday person. Have we all lost our minds?
23With my friends in Indonesia and Singapore, the birthday girl/guy pays. With my friends here, we either split the bill and pay for the birthday person, or we each (including the bday person) pay our own share.
I personally don't want the bday person to pay for anything. But I hate freeloaders at parties.
24When my friends and I go out for birthdays, usually it's the significant other that pays for the birthday person's meal. But if there is no significant other, SOMEONE always offers. That's just how we are.
With my work buddies. It's all girls & 1 guy. And whenever it's one of the girls' birthdays, he buys that girl lunch. He does that he says because us girls take turns baking the cakes for the birthdays (his included!).
25This happens a lot. In fact just last Friday I went to a birthday celebration for a friend who turned 21. We're all broke college students, but we're honest haha. We pay for what we ate and drank. I have never been in a situation where we split the bill equally amongst everyone, even people who didn't eat or drink. NEVER. We pay for what we want. Some of us who feel like being generous will chip in for the birthday boy/girl, so they don't have to pay. I don't see why people even bother to split the bill among everyone. People stop being cheap. That's not fair. If you can't afford something, don't go. It's that freakin' simple. Don't try to spread it out among everyone.
26Well I suppose it depends. Ya'll that answered before me are probably professionals and have good or acceptable jobs. College students just don't have the same amount of money to throw around, for lack of a better term. Why should someone who bought five different things pay the same as someone who bought nothing, or vice versa. And it depends on the place too. I don't think you would be all reaching for your wallets at a highbrow restaurant. But that's what we do at my school. We just all pass around the bill and take out our money and add it to the book, rounding up for tip. It's very fair that way. And we're all honest and not moochers. If someone tries to(it has been very rare), we call them on it. You pay your share. It's just good home training.
27when i have birthday dinners, i pay for it (or my parents=) bec. i invited them plus they give me gifts so its like im giving back to them, but if it is thrown for me...then i should be paid for.
28On my 17th birthday my two best friends and I went out to eat dinner. They had offered to pay for me as a gift. When the bill came they fought over who had to pay the extra penny from the uneven split. I finally became so irritated that I paid the whole bill and left. I mostly spend my birthday with my family or boyfriend and they usually pay. If it is a group of friends I will offer to pay and I have always been turned down, since that night. My birthday is coming up on the 17th and I intend to spend a quite night with a few close friends and family. I am inviting people and I will pay for the meal because many of my nearest and dearest are traveling to be with me for my 24th birthday.
29I think all the guests should pay their part and split the birthday girls portion of the bill. She shouldn't have to pay on her big day.
30It's always been a tradition with me and my friends that the birthday guy/girl would pay for the dinner, and so far we've had no arguments about it (except maybe which restaurant we'll be booking and how many people should we invite when there are two birthday guys/girls). But it's also okay to call it off once in a while. There's not much pressure about birthday celebrations with my friends, which is why I love them. Haha.
31I ALWAYS pay for my own birthday dinner! It never fails! It's not that I want to pay for it, I guess I just have cheapo friends or something. AND If I didn't say HEY, were all gonna go get some dinner for my birthday, then there would be NO celebration whatsoever. I have good friends too, and no one will ever step up and pitch in a little to help. EVER! It hurts my heart cause if it were me in their situation, I will always step up and not make them pay!
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Please share your opinion with our community, but make sure it is on topic and follows our Community Rules. We moderate comments and prohibit personal attacks, threats, spam, lewd images, or the promotion of your personal website.