Do You Socialize With Servers?

March 10, 2009

Maybe it's because I'm from a very social family, but when I go to a restaurant I can't help but socialize with my waiters. Whether I'm asking their opinion on the wine list or wondering what their name is, I enjoy chatting with my servers. How about you?

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24 Comments

kh61582 4 years 10 weeks

When I'm eating alone I want to be left alone but when I'm with other people then I do socialize with the server. My father is always very rude to waiters so when I eat out with my family I feel like it's my job to soothe the way a little. My ex used to be overly friendly with waiters to the point of being goofy. It was really unattractive to watch:( The best is when I eat out with my friends. We always get into sarcastic banter and the waiters think it's hilarious.

gLam shortie 4 years 10 weeks

I've been a server for about a year and a half now and i love a friendly chat with a nice customer. BUT that's when the restaurant is pretty slow....it's a pain when a customer hold you there at your table for more than 30 seconds when you have 3-4 other tables you must go check on!!! Don't tell me that you are ready to order but ask the person next to you what they are having and be indecisive, but when i ask them if i should come back in a few, say no!!! my biggest pet peeve. but anyhow, being having a friendly chat is always nice, but when you tell your server that they did a great job, PLEASE, show that on your tips....i always get really nice comments about my service and recieve awful tip percentage (14-15% or below). Make sure you double the tax...tip percentage should be 18% or higher if you think they did a good job!!! SERVING IS A HARD JOB!!! (especially when you are trying to pay college tuition!)

aimeeb 4 years 10 weeks

A little bit but that's about it.

Tabloid 4 years 10 weeks

Depends on which server but mostly, NO. There's a lot out there who flirt with me even when I'm eating with my dad. It's soo uncomfortable.

BOBCAT 4 years 10 weeks

wow, everyone is so so different on this,,, very important to chat with them, i think! but then i am chatty with all!

greenapples1987 4 years 10 weeks

i do not socialize with my waiter. i think they are there to do a job..serve me!!

shoneyjoe 4 years 11 weeks

I'm weirded out when the server kneels or crouches next to my table and starts chatting with me. I'm weirded out when they touch my shoulder. There are a very limited number of restaurants and bars where I'm a local and I feel OK chatting with the server. Otherwise, no thanks.

starangel82 4 years 11 weeks

It depends. If the serve is chatty, I usually chat back. I had a serve cross a line once. My best friends and I all drink Diet Coke although two of them drink it because they are diabetic. The server actually asked if we (all of us) were diabetic just because we all ordered Diet Cokes. I considered that very rude.

emalove 4 years 11 weeks

Yeah, I agree with HoneyBrown that it depends. I'm always friendly, but don't feel the need to "socialize" or chat usually.

HoneyBrown1976 4 years 11 weeks

It depends. I don't really care for overly chatty servers; but, I'll socialize a small bit.

jhig 4 years 11 weeks

I'm not a very socialable person. I perfer a very quite meal & atmosphere. My politness is mandatory and expect the same from the Wait Staff. I'm not a class warrior by any means, but I do want a Server/Waiter that is presentable, but yet forgetable.

Modus Vivendi 4 years 11 weeks

Whenever the server is like, "Hi, I'm John, I'll be taking care of you today," I always feel like it's only polite to reply back, "Hi, John. I'm Kate!"

CoconutPie 4 years 11 weeks

I hate it when I get a chatty waiter. Sometimes they're almost impolite, like when they sit down at your table or do inappropriate jokes. I'm not the most social person and I'm not comfortable talking to strangers. It kind of ruins my experience. I find ''chatty waiters'' to be almost a cultural thing. Waiters don't talk to their clients as much in other parts of the world.

godeats 4 years 11 weeks

As a rule, I would prefer that the server deliver exquisite and unnoticed service. They should make the meal run smoothly, not be part of the meal. That is especially true if you are engaged in serious or enjoyable conversation with your fellow guests. That is my rule most of the time, however, since my husband and I are both in the food industry and have been married for more than a decade (thus occasionally leaving the conversation a little dull), when we dine out alone, we often enjoy conversation with the server if they have the time and ability to carry on a good one.

Spectra 4 years 11 weeks

I'm always polite to my server, but I don't usually chat with him/her unless they start chatting with me first. I figure they're probably sort of busy and probably don't want to spend 10 minutes hanging out at our table. Plus, if I'm out with my husband, I want to talk to HIM, not the waiter.

Frika 4 years 11 weeks

depends on the place, the server and the situation. Sometimes I just want to be out to spend time with the people i'm out with. I do LOVE friendly service and helpful suggestions, but i don't consider that "socializing". Now my Dad, if he drinks just enough, will be very chatty, especially women. He once tried to guess our servers perfume, and he was dead on! (he says because it's one he always buys my mom)

ilanac13 4 years 11 weeks

it really depends on the situation. if they are nice and i'm in a mood to chat - then i have no problem doing so. for the most part though, i'm usually not in a chatty mood when i'm out - i'd rather talk to the ppl that i'm with.

chiefdishwasher 4 years 11 weeks

We take it even farther and guess the server's name. We actually got it right once and he actually brought us a free dessert.

skigurl 4 years 11 weeks

depending on the place, the server, who i'm with, how many drinks i've had, the ambiance, and my mood, i will converse to a degree....nothing too crazy but you can get jokey with the right server....but i really dont like when they are trying to be chatty and i just want to be left alone (like wren said) - i dont go to a restaurant to make new friends, i go to spend time with the friends i went with....it's all about responding to the signs the diners are giving off, i think

partysugar 4 years 11 weeks

soulight: my dad is the same way as your boyfriend.

wren 4 years 11 weeks

It drives me nuts when I get a chatty server when I'm on an intimate date. I just want to talk to my bf.

soulight 4 years 11 weeks

My boyfriend is all about chatting the server up, he also determines how to tip that person by how chatty they are with him. He thinks that if he builds a small rapaport with them, they will be nicer to him and really take care of him like filling his glass of water. I , on the other hand, am way too shy.

Spiderlove 4 years 11 weeks

I'm polite and nice (unless they aren't), but my bf thinks it's his job to befriend the world... he will tell jokes or make comments, it drives me nuts. I waitressed for a while, and while I appreciated pleasant customers, wait staff truly do not care, nor do they wish to be entertained by you! Be pleasant, be friendly, leave a nice tip, thats all!

margokhal 4 years 11 weeks

It depends on the server, not the restaurant. If the server's chatty and helpful, then I'll talk to them a bit more. Also, the server is performing a service for you - so there's no reason to be rude to them. It may even bring you better service [and of course, you should reward with a good tip for them]! :)

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